June Movies - Week 4

Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,

Utah Gay Rodeo was a bunch of fun (even if attendance wasn't amazing, but we've got ideas for next year) and it's officially summer with 95+ degree weather... so we stay inside & watch movies when we can...

June 21 – Return to Lonesome Dove (1993)
 
This sequel to the Lonesome Dove mini-series picks up with some of the same cast (Rick Schroeder, Chris Cooper, etc) but then replaces Tommy Lee Jones as Cpt. Call with Jon Voight… and Anjelica Huston with Barbara Hershey… and throws in a young Reese Witherspoon, Dennis Haysbert , CCH Pounder, Lou Gossett, Nia Peeples and… Oliver Reed as a Scottish cattle baron in Montana! Okay yes, it’s not quite as good as the original… I mean… Jon Voight isn’t horrible… but it’s almost a different character from TLJ’s Cpt. Call too… the story is about Newt getting into some circumstances where he ends up almost inheriting Oliver Reed’s empire (and hooking up with his 14 year old wife Reese Witherspoon) but then… you know… you were my family first even though I was an a-hole… it’s a western… and we’ve been watching a lot of them recently.
 
Rating – 8/10 – Still worth a watch… there’s definitely some fun & intrigue… but be warned it’s six hours
 
June 23 – Twisted Metal (2024)
 
This ten-episode season on Peacock based on the video game franchise (loosely?) centers around John Doe (Anthony Mackie) who’s a delivery driver between… basically Mega Cities from Judge Dredd through the barren wasteland of criminals between (at least in the US, never really elaborates if the rest of the world is just fine) and he gets “the final job” from the mayor of New San Francisco (Neve Campbell) where if he picks up a package in New Chicago & comes back… then he gets to live in the city. Along the way, he hooks up with a girl on a vengeance spree against the personification of ACAB (Thomas Haden Church) & finds out more about his mysterious past… and this show was a LOT of fun. Everybody was great! Especially the body of Samoa Joe & voice of Will Arnett combining as the psycho clown Sweet Tooth! Season two should be coming… who knows? 2027 probably? Writers strike… Peacock… mergers… whatever…
 
Rating – 10/10 – Some of the drama is just to drag it out to 4-5 hours but… a LOT of fun
 
June 25 – The Muppet Movie (1979)
 
It’s the first Muppets movie… and they’re on a road trip to Hollywood… and hijinx & cameos ensue!
 
Rating – 9/10 – Not my favorite Muppets movie… but it’s a Muppets movie… so it’s great!
 
June 27 – Streets of Laredo (1995)
 
Yes, a THIRD Lonesome Dove series… and this one has the legend himself James Garner an ever-further aged Captain Call… and he’s been hired by the railroads to take out a… (deep sigh) 14-year blonde Mexican boy sniper who’s robbing trains & just killing a bunch of people and livestock while doing it. But wait… he can’t be doing it alone (though it’s inferred he basically is) but also involved is a Native American guy named Mox Mox who BURNS PEOPLE ALIVE!!! Okay… and you’re only sending a 70-something retired Texas ranger after these guys? Oh don’t worry, he’s taking his other retired corporal… and some random deputy he picked up along the way… and the accountant who’s handling his bills… and Randy Quaid pops up as a pointless gunslinger. Look… luckily this one was only 4 hours or so… and it’s not that it’s a bad series or anything… it was just so much darker than the first two. Yes, the first two dealt with death & being in the West was tough… but on top of all the stuff I already said… the accountant’s wife died suddenly off screen… the deputy’s wife killed herself after being raped by the local sheriff… who then also killed himself… Call loses his leg in a long, drawn-out way… the teenage killer’s entire family is a sad tale of a whore who has a simple boy, a blind girl & the oldest is THE F**KING DEVIL killing half of Texas… and the best thing in her life is drunken George Carlin wanting to be near her but he’s in the Friend Zone… and I’m sure there was more that I’m just forgetting already… but yeah, just crazy… and the whole time I’m like “What’s Newt/Rick Schroeder up to while this is going on?”
 
Rating – 8/10 – I love me some James Garner… but the last third he’s just there being mopey and/or moaning in pain

Is there more Lonesome Dove things to see out there?!? Wait and find out...

​Steve