Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,
It’s November... aka October 2!!! You know what that means… Izzy goes a little crazy with decoration for the house so that two humans, three cats & a sh*t ton of rats, ladybugs and box elder bugs can see them because we’re socially distanced (and nobody wants to come visit anyway). We’ve also decided that we’re going to try to watch 31 horror movies in the month… though we’re not restricting ourselves to new horror movies like other people out there. Izzy’s not a fan of gore and… we just watch a bunch of movies already. No time to waste on crap unless it’s something we wanted to watch for a long time… or rewatch. So on that note, here’s the next week of that has gone thus far…
Nov 5 – Muppets Haunted Mansion (2021)
We were checking out Disney+ to see if a new release was ready for us… and we found this 45 minute show featuring the Muppets! We love the Muppets! A few years ago I had taken Izzy to Disneyland for the first time since the early 90s & the first attraction we went to was The Haunted Mansion. Will Arnett & other stars pop in. This was made for us! Basically Gonzo & Pepe (the king prawn) get invited to the Mansion on Haunted Hill party… Will Arnett is hosting… and hijinx ensue! Were there a lot of Muppets? Of course! Did any of them really do anything other than say they were doing a cameo? Not really. Was there music? Of course! It’s an episode of the Muppet Show.
Rating – 8/10 – Nothing really memorable, but dammit I like the Muppets in general.
Nov 6 – Hider in the House (1989)
Again flipping through Amazon and what they recommend based on my viewing history and… Gary Busey is a psychopath who lives in the walls of a new house owned by Michael McKean & Mimi Rogers?!? How have I not already seen this?!? Yes, it’s fairly predictable and Busey plays a good crazy… and Mimi Rogers is quite fetching… and the kids aren’t even that annoying. If the synopsis intrigues you, I’d say check it out!
Rating – 8/10 – You get what you paid for… Prime Busey… and even Jake playing young Busey
Nov 7 – Split Second (1992)
I had seen this movie poster as a kid & it totally looked like a mix of Alien & Blade Runner… and it kinda was!!! In the distant future of 2008, the climate is out of control & London is basically flooded. Only loose cannon detective Harley Stone (Rutger Hauer) and his surprisingly quirky new partner (some British guy who voices Alfred in Batman cartoons now) can track down a serial killer who has returned after seven years… and killed Harley’s old partner. Well, throw in Kim Cattrall in a bad wig for some reason & the serial killer is some sort of alien and BOOM! You’ve got yourself a movie… by the way, the first movie written by Gary Scott Thompson of “Fast & Furious” fame.
Rating – 9/10 – Dripping with 80’s action funk that I love… just a few years too late to be appreciated at the time
Nov 8 – Highway to Hell (1991)
A man & woman are headed to Vegas to get married (Rob Lowe’s little brother Chad & Kristy Swanson) when they’re pulled over & some giant HellCop snags the woman and heads off into the desert… well, okay, it ends up being in Hell!!! Had I known this movie existed, we probably would’ve covered it back in March during our Devil Month as we get the Devil portrayed by Patrick Bergin (“Robin Hood” & “Lawnmower Man 2: Jobe’s War”) and it’s just a crazy from the director of “Drop Dead Fred” and the writer of “Assassins” & “LA Confidential” among others.
Rating – 9/10 – Goofy fun… and Chad is no Rob… but serious “Cherry 2000” vibes and I love it!!!
Nov 9 – Warlock (1989)
An evil warlock (Julian Sands) travels through time from the Salem witch trials to the late 1980s and is pursued by a witch-hunter (Richard E. Grant) with a dopey blonde involved. From the director of “Friday the 13th 2” & “Halloween H20” and the writer of “The Fugitive” & “GI Jane” comes a pretty campy guilty pleasure movie. The effects are decent at parts… and then comical at others… but Sands & Grant do a great job and this was pretty entertaining.
Rating – 8/10 – Not the best but certainly not the worst
Nov 10 – Trilogy of Terror (1975)
This is basically the Karen Black show with three weird, twisted horror tales from the mid-70s brought to life by the macabre director Dan Curtis (“Dracula” 1972 with Jack Palance). The story that everybody remembers is the one with the Zulu fetish doll or whatever that’s 80% teeth and stabby weapons… but the other two stories dip into things like feminine power (or lack thereof) in the 70s and just some weird things to have in a modern day horror flick. Obviously this was back in the 70s though so that makes sense I guess.
Rating – 9/10 – Definitely worth a watch if you’re into classic horror movies… but you also feel the low budget aspect of it at points
Nov 11 – Route 666 (2001)
Federal agents Lou Diamond Phillips & Lori Petty are in hot pursuit of a witness on the run in the Arizona desert… and being pursued by Russian hitmen (led by our favorite SVEN OLE THORSEN!!!) so they have to take an abandoned road to escape (for some reason). This leads them into a mysterious stretch of road where… ghosts basically show up and kill all who enter!!! This one is… a little out there plot wise but… still a lot of fun. LDP & Steven Williams who plays the witness are great… it’s early 2000s headsplosions and all that… definitely straight-to-DVD though.
Rating – 8/10 – I thoroughly enjoyed it but… it did drag at some points… and you know, stupid people in horror movies
Well, that'll do for another week... but we've got some dandies coming next week, so prepare your loins!!!
This is how I end the post,
Steve and Izzy
Steve and Izzy are the hosts behind the EILFM podcast, are BJCP beer judges and have terrible to questionable taste in movies. Along with the PodCats Pickles, Cameron and Poe they will justify why these movies are amazing