November Movies - Week 5
Good Afternoon Ladies & Gentlemen,
It's the last week of November… and here are some good ones...
Nov 26 – Safe House (1998)
Okay… so we were looking through IMDb while watching “Christmas Chronicles” and the actress that played the mom was in this movie… and it’s billed as a late 90s action movie starring Sir Patrick Stewart as a retired government hitman who is now in the sights of a former general running for President of the United States!!! I’m f**king IN!!! What? It’s FREE on TUBI!!! DOUBLE IN!!! Okay, this is not that kind of movie… the action is honestly pretty minimal… there’s a comic relief character who is just f**king horrible… but Sir Patrick calls him out on it a few times… and it really becomes a journey into Alzheimer’s Disease ravaging a family… but does it end that way? I strongly recommend that you guys check this movie out… there are so many things you see Sir Patrick do and/or say in this movie that it’s worth the price of admission alone.
Rating – 10/10 – This movie got me good!!! Check it out on Tubi!!!
Nov 27 – Doctor Mordrid (1992)
So we were watching the MST3K Turkey Day Marathon… and an advertisement for their new season dropped a few frames of this movie… which is essentially an early 90s Doctor Strange movie (like that’s what it was & they had rights from Marvel… until they didn’t & changed a few minor things) starring Jeffrey Combs as Doctor Stran… er, Mordrid… Brian Thompson as the evil sorcerer… and brought to you by Full Moon Pictures!!! Oh AND it’s free on Tubi?!? We had to watch this immediately… and it did NOT disappoint. Future episode? Absolutely… but in the meantime, it was a lot of fun & I recommend checking it out for free while you still can.
Rating – 10/10 – Campy fun for the whole family!!!
Nov 28 – Free Guy (2021)
Speaking of fun, we finally watched this release from back in July I think… where Ryan Reynolds is an NPC in a GTA rip-off… but somehow gains sentience? Hijinx ensue… and it’s Ryan Reynolds so you know it’s fun… and Taika Waititi shows up as the villain… perfection for hilariousness… and it’s a bit of a dig at the “connected” world & video games… while also giving them a lot of love too.
Rating – 10/10 – Definitely check it out… it’s like a live-action Wreck It Ralph but for young adults who can swear
Nov 29 – Candyman (2021)
Truth be told… I LOVE the original Candyman… and the first sequel isn’t bad either… but hadn’t seen the others in a loooong time but I remember them being hot trash. I’ve been waiting to see this REAL sequel for a long time. I even considered seeing it in theatres but it was during the Delta Variant scare and… well, horror isn’t Izzy’s thing… but she’s okay with just listening while she plays Animal Crossing. That being said… I highly recommend checking this one out if horror is you’re thing. It’s really predictable from the trailer… but still a lot of creepy atmosphere & fun. The one thing that got me was… there’s a character in the movie who’s an art critic who looked a LOT like Virginia Madsen (from the original) and the whole time she was on screen I was like “Is that her? Supposed to be her reincarnated or something?” The answer is no… so don’t worry about that.
Rating – 10/10 – Hard hitting race relations stuff throughout as well… great flick!!!
Nov 30 – Never Take Candy From a Stranger (1960)
This one’s from the Hammer Collection and… basically it’s about a little girl who comes home one day after playing with her friend… and she tells her parents that she went to a rich old guy’s house when he offered them candy… and they took off their clothes. (record scratch) Yeah, it jumps right into that in the first 3-4 minutes. How do the parents react? Well… as most parents would I guess in the 1950’s, they first try to talk to the rich family… and then to the police. Okay, the order in which things are done in this movie are a little odd because… I guess a “key point” is that they’re an English family who just moved to Canada to be a school principal and… whatever… but the rest of the movie is about how holding the big rich family in town responsible for their actions is damned near impossible until… well, hijinx ensue? I guess? It was a mildly frustrating movie to watch because it’s so simplistically applicable to today’s age… and yet can be torn apart in today’s atmosphere as well… but it was 1960 when it was made.
Rating – 9/10 – Great flick that I recommend checking out… but it’ll also boil the blood a bit too, so there’s that warning
Dec 1 – Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (1964)
So… Martians are orbiting the Earth & are curious why their kids are lame and monotone while Earth children are full of whimsy & wonder. Television in December is all about Christmas and so there’s only one possibility… Santa Claus! He’s the difference! So now they snatch up two random earth kids for some reason… then Santa… and are off to Mars to change their society… and hijinx ensue! This is obviously for an episode of our podcast so… check it out on your favorite podcatcher under Everything I Learned From Movies!
Rating – 7/10 – Not going to lie… it’s not as bad as I thought… but still kinda rough & oddly funny
Alright, I think that'll do it for a bit... might not be seeing as many movies during the Christmas season so... hit me up @EILFMovies on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram or Patreon if you want to hear more... and you know we're at Everything I Learned From Movies on ALL your favorite podcatchers!!! Deuces!!!
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Steve and Izzy
Steve and Izzy are the hosts behind the EILFM podcast, are BJCP beer judges and have terrible to questionable taste in movies. Along with the PodCats Pickles, Cameron and Poe they will justify why these movies are amazing